My Moment.

I have shared this story with a few people IRL (in real life) and I decided it was time to share it with our blog family. It's about a moment when God revealed himself to me in a very tangible way. A moment that was very special, and some people may think too private to reveal on a blog, but I am willing to share. I want to put it out there so people who don't already know can understand more about the God I serve. The God who knows when we have hit our limits and when He needs to throw us a rope. I will set the stage.

It was a Friday. Ashley and I had been at the house with Steph while everyone else was at the funeral home making arrangements. The Hospice nurse showed up before they returned. I was nervous about mom and Scot not being there. They were the only people who knew EXACTLY what to do. They were the ones who were there 24/7 so I was slightly terrified that a situation might arise where I wouldn't know what to do. It did. I was faced with a situation that I wasn't prepared for and it upset me...bad. (Let me be clear, it was not anything the nurse did. She was AMAZING. It was just a situation that came up that was out of our control.) Then they told us we only had a few days left, I had a chore to do that I was glad to do but it was very hard and someone threw a Bible verse in my face regarding my tattoo. All the while, I had a heartbreaking image running through my head. I went home and felt completely defeated. There was A LOT of sobbing and ugly crying. I wasn't sure I had the strength I needed. Until the next day.

Saturday. Back at mom and dad's. We were in my old room. Just me and Steph. She looked at home next to the orange walls and homemade art from Claire and Drew as well as the sports sheets I found during a retail therapy trip to Target! It was quiet. I gently stroked her forehead and tried to tame her wispy locks of hair. I prayed over her and told her what the boys were doing outside. I kissed her face and started to cry. I already missed her. She had not been talking much during the previous few days and the week before was filled with a lot of talking...but not much of it made sense. I whispered to her, "Oh Steph. I just love you so much." Much to my surprise, she whispered back, "I love you too." She paused and said, "I am so grateful for you." I couldn't believe it. She was having a lucid moment, and I was blessed enough to be sitting there when it happened. I asked her if it would be okay if I read to her. She nodded. I grabbed my Bible and said, "Okay God....give us something good." (It never fails, I do the "open and point" expecting God to send me this amazing passage and I get a family lineage passage or something equally as confusing!) He heard my cry. I opened to Ecclesiastes 4:9

9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:
10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

I cried harder. I grabbed her hand and said, "STEPH! HE sent this for US! WE are going to takecare of you and WE are going to make sure these boys are okay. ALL of us!"

She whispered, "Thank you."
I whispered back..."No, thank YOU."

Those were the last words she spoke to me and I will treasure that moment for as long as I live. God knew I needed that moment. He knew I was torn down. Isn't that amazing? Isn't HE amazing? I think so.